Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
I cant date a girl that sucks dick at sucking dick
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
It's 1 AM and there's a guy outside my house belting out Bennie and The Jets. He stops in between verses to puke. I'm joining him.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Wait is this black Chris #1, cocaine Chris, or gay Chris?
No this is saxophone Chris
If its not for food we ain't going out.
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
Dude, Kevin called the cops on the cops.
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Randomize
