not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Come on in and take your pants off
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