Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
I'm not a home wrecker but if one more married man with a yacht asks me to go scuba diving I'm NOT saying no
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
This is my gift to your gina
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
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