it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
When he swipes my v card it will be comparable to my bat mitzvah. should I make sweatshirts or sweatpants?
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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