How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
you are like the bill nye of illicit activities
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
