1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Oh? I just remember dropping coins and trying to give the manager change to let me back into the bar.
You had me at "let me see your balls"
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
If I had your ass I would rule the world
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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