I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
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