i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
buying a tattoo gun on ebay just sounded like a good idea at the time idk man
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Randomize
