omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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