this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
I am mentally ready for anal.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Do you realize we were driving someone else’s car and I was holding the wheel while you were driving and sucking my dick. That’s NOT normal
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
