Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
well you can't waste a boner
We need to rekindle our bromance
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
How is it that I know 4 different bartenders who won't charge me for drinks, but I can't get laid?
Randomize