fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
why is there a fishing net hanging from my ceiling fan?
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
My tinder date had to be home by 8:30 cause she's on house arrest.
I'm like the big dick whisperer.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I'm not fucking any of these fools. But if they want to buy me Olive Garden, that's their business.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
