This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
You yelled This cop is arresting me for possession! Possession of MARIJUANA!!", everyone cheered, and you let him handcuff you and take you away.
I woke up this morning with a half eaten bagel and an empty pack of imitation crab meat in my bed. This is going to be my response to pick up lines now.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
