i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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