We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
Semen is not good for contacts.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
Randomize
