I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
Randomize