So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
You blacked out at 9:30 and insisted on sleeping in the hallway after you chugged an entire pitcher of beer. I guess the Jell-O shots were stronger than we thought...
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize
