new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
Just want the two of you to know, I went to a golf tournament today. Respectable, expensive… Flipped the golf cart. Seriously, I'm 40. What the fuck?
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
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