yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
I can't make this stuff up. Your ex is singing I Will Survive on the karaoke.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
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