I need help removing her.
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Cops do not care. One just laughed and said "precious"
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
He follows more cats on Instagram then he does girls.. That's how you know your boyfriend is whipped.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
Randomize
