I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
I left you a really long drunk voicemail and I remember something about a bat
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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