i don't mind that he's uncut. i like it! it's like a little sweater!
a cock doensn't need a sweater! especially a skin sweater! wtf.
That's like some buffalo bill hannibal lector shit.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
there are 5 pictures on my phone from last night, 4 are too blurry to recognize and the 5th is you dangling a twizzler over your mouth, naked.
your like the ambassador to my penis.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
jump out the window naked night went bad
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