I hope mine doesn't look like that
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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