Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
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