my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
How was your Memorial Day?
Don't remember... but I do have an American flag painted on my boob signed by a Staff Sargent... Oh God, I hope that's his military rank and not a nick name.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
