You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
You claimed that someone else had vomited underneath you/on your hand
you were very insulted that we didn’t believe you that someone else vommed
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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