I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
No subtext here. People are naked.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
It's official drugs can't kill me
I am ina trunk. Iam in a trunnnnnjkk. I hope its yours. Oh manomanomano. Thids better be your trunk
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
Randomize
