I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
We had on the same team jersey so at the time it made sense to hook up.
Duh.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
You can glorify being single all you want but relationships are awesome. I haven't gone more than 24 hours without sex since June.
It's hard to judge what a reasonable amount of cereal looks like in the spaghetti pot. We're out of cap'n crunch and milk.
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
It's no shave November. This is our time.
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize