Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
Randomize
