I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I was cut off by 8, I need to rethink this breakup therapy strategy
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
I need water and some morals
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
