remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
What did we do last night that was yellow?
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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