Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
