The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
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