Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
There are pre-booty call contracts for a reason. I have no intention of calling you tomorrow.
Do you need my fax number or something?
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
