in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
how should i go about explaining the hickey i drunkenly gave myself last night?
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
What happened to chicks over dicks?
That rule does not apply to 9 inch dicks..
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Finished my senior thesis. How am I celebrating you ask? By drinking gas station white zif out of an empty candle holder by myself. I fucking deserve to graduate.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
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