The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
It's either my own vomit or popcorn butter in my ear right now. Banking on the second one.
We made popcorn last night. So it's both
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Dad danced on top of the bar with me last night. And has a video of me doing a beer bong.
And you tried to get me to have sex with you in our Harry potter closet lol
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
