Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Just fucking put out. It'll be a good lay, promise. Stop being a prude. Damn it. A boy is trying to put his penis in you. APPRECIATE IT.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I apologize in advance for the number of sex toys drying on the bathroom sink.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
