thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
I got us kicked out of the bar because the waitress found me in the kitchen trying to make spaghetti
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
eh, I feel I'm heading for a breakdown and I need to get it out of the way before I start writing that lab report.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
