so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
I've had a Margarita with salt, but I have to say I was impressed by the Stoli and Sprite rimmed with adderall
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
