Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
The magic cards should have been the first clue. The comments that I have "amazing birthing hips" and that I'm "beautiful in a child bearing sort of way just sealed his fate.
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
