did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
Randomize
