i always forget guys have bellybuttons
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
Dude also, my grandma got me condoms for easter and kind of winked. I don't know what to think
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
Do you have Pokemon Go yet? I just caught a Clefairy on my walk of shame and feel way better about myself.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize
