im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Whoever put salsa in the kiddie pool.....your an ass. Fuck you.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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