dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I just don't understand how my upright asian catholic roommate is getting more than me.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
And my parents said I crawled through the house
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Randomize
