As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Ketchup is God's man juice
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Just caught my first cougar this fake was worth every fucking penny.
You left me on the phone while you grabbed a plastic bag and started puking. I recorded it. Its my new ringtone for you
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
He wrote on the paper that he wanted a "Ptitty burreto" from taco bell...when we ordered it the girl paused and entered "Potatoe burrieto"....we laughed
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
