Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
you kept yelling 'bird cage' in between songs and finally the lead singer stopped to ask if you meant 'free bird' and you said 'fuck you, i'm not gay', needless to say you were kindly escorted out
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
you came out with your cock in between the legs of a balloon animal. Maybe she'll think you have a sense of humor.
What kind of balloon animal was it?
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
How many times is too many times to use the word 'fuck' in my thesis?
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
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