Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
