i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
Just screamed wow while using my vibrator.. new low
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
