Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
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