i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
my dad just referred to me and my boobs as 'the three of you'
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Yo this huge scar on my head from the car accident is truly a vag magnet. Probably because I'm telling people I was attacked by a mountain lion and killed it with my bare hands. But hey when life gives you lemons, you use them to get pussy
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize